I went to the gym this morning for the first time in what feels like a very long time. I didn’t work out much during my extended busy business lady business trip, save for some half-hearted attempts at “stretching” and “calisthenics” in my teeny-tiny hotel rooms.
Turns out hotel gyms in Europia aren’t really all that conducive to exercise, what with the pasta bars and ashtrays on the treadmills and stuff at hotel gyms there. I’m kidding! There aren’t ashtrays on the treadmills at hotel gyms in Europia, silly! You just flick your ashes wherever you want while you’re working out, yo!
My boss and I wondered out loud how Europians stay so svelte, given the over-abundance of wine and carbs in their diets. We speculated that it was probably due to all of the fancy cigarettes and
sorta illegal not-approved-by-the-FDA diet pills that everypony in Europia consumes on the daily, obvs. That, or all Europians have been genetically modified to absorb carbohydrates differently from us North Americans, because if we ate as much carbs as Europians did, we’d totes have to wear our elastic-waisted jeggings, like, all of the time.
Despite my new hurr did, I hate everyone and everything today. I suppose that if you knew me IRL, you’d know why. (Thanks for understanding.) Otherwise, check out the aborbz bunnies and candy rainbows shooting out of my ass!!!!