Yesterday evening, I had a quik-e conversation with the boy nanny’s about the failed playdate situation over the weekend, and I told her that while I felt bad about reneging on the playdate, I felt worse about having to navigate around the boy’s social calendar and needing to arrange playdates for the boy with kids who I don’t think are a good influence on my son.
The boy’s nanny told me that a) I was over-thinking the situation and b) I need to let it go because there are some parents at the boy’s school who don’t accept my “lifestyle” and don’t want their kids to have playdates with the boy simply because he has two dads, so I should keep an open mind, too. The boy’s nanny is correct.
OK, let me back up for a second: generally speaking, the Busy-Lazy boys live in a pretty diverse and accepting community. I feel fortunate that (most) peeps who live here are, in fact, well-educated and open-minded enough to recognize that a kid who has two parents of the same gender isn’t a big deal. But since our town is adjacent to Uppityville, there is some inevitable spill-over of judgmental, conservative douchebags who are obsessed with how other peeps live their lives. They believe that God has entrusted them with teaching sinners how to walk the righteous path, and anyone who deviates from the path that they’ve identified as the right one should be ostracized and/or ridiculed.
Nevermind that these judgmental, conservative douchebags are likely alcoholics who ignore and/or beat their children as well as abuse and cheat on their spouses, the mere fact that they are God-fearing peeps means they get a pass.
I dunno why these judgmental, conservative douchebags choose to live here because our town is crawling with the gays. And people of color. And pagans and atheists and such. I can only imagine how difficult it must be for these judgmental, conservative douchebags to walk through the local Trader Joe’s and have to witness the abomination of two dads or two moms shopping for groceries with our children.
Despite the benefits of living in the suburbs versus living in the city (and there are many benefits), one of the major drawbacks is that there are pockets in the suburbs that can feel like living a time warp. Cities and city dwellers tend to live in the present, while (some) suburbanites can sometimes be stuck in the 1950s.
So the boy’s nanny was telling me about one of the boy’s classmates’ mother who has been extremely vocal about her displeasure with the “lifestyle” that my son is exposed to, and thus this judgey highfalutin mom doesn’t allow her kid to have playdates at our house. Granted, I probably wouldn’t want her kid to come to our house anyway, lest he be exposed to our gay cooties and turn out to be fabulous, but that’s besides the point.
Here’s the plot twist: lately, judgey highfalutin mom has been asking the boy’s nanny if the boy can go over to the judgey highfalutin house for playdates. The boy’s nanny’s response to judgey highfalutin mom is simply, “No.” When judgey highfalutin mom asks why, the boy’s nanny says, “No is no.” And when judgey highfalutin mom presses the issue, the boy’s nanny says, “Because my God doesn’t judge anyone.” Which apparently immediately shuts up judgey highfalutin mom’s facehole.
It’s ironic that the boy’s devoutly Roman Catholic nanny has been pushed into the position of having to defend our “lifestyle.” She told me that each family she has cared for has become part of her own family, and we teach each other things about love and acceptance because that’s what families do. The boy’s nanny is pretty cool.
Since I live in the present (and not in the 1950s), I continue to be confounded by peeps who think that there is such a dramatic difference in the “lifestyles” of LGBT parents and non-LGBT parents. Truth is, I suspect we’re probably more alike than not. Except I probably wouldn’t be caught dead with the bad perm and awful shoes that judgey highfalutin mom wears on the daily. But who am I to judge, amirite?
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- electradaddy said: Good for you!
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- carlshow said: I just don’t see why your sexuality is an issue… Kill anyone lately? Defraud a charity? No? Then I personally think you are alright. Your famjam is adorable and I think your lovelife is none of my damned business. Period. Oh btw; I love your bloggage.😄
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- photolodico said: So as a Christian I just want to apologize for people who spout hate and say its because they are Christians. But its cool. They hate me too. Because its their thing. My thing is photography and cheese. Not always together.
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- mommafessional said: That was supposed to say: “I heart this post so much!!!”
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- jon-of-art said: Wow what an awesome nanny!
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- michellecerami said: Ugh, hate that. It’s not right to say you love Jesus and hate the gays.
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- motherofmadcatsandbabies said: I think I love your Nanny!!