Lazy Dad's Guide to Everything

Hi Jobeth! I don’t think I’ve answered this question before, so thanks for asking!

When busy daddy and I first talked about creating our family, we always just assumed that we would adopt our kids. However, early on we attended an adoption conference aimed at LGBT families and we sat in on a session about surrogacy. 

We ended up having a private follow-up meeting with the attorney who hosted the session, and honestly, it was incredibly demoralizing. First, we had to pay a fee just to hear virtually the exact same things that she said at the conference. And then we discoverd that pretty much every single move we made involved additional costs. Plus, hiring a surrogate would have involved at least four people: busy daddy, me, an egg donor, and then a gestational surrogate. It all seemed way too complicated—not to mention emotionally draining, so we decided not to move forward with surrogacy.

We know a few families that have had tremendous luck and happiness by creating their families through surrogacy, but it wasn’t for us. I don’t believe that biology makes a family. It’s corny, but it’s hard to imagine our son being anyone else’s son but ours. I’m sure we’ll feel the same way about our hypothetical daughter and/or son when she or he arrives!